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The question is - how do I change all this -- how can I defeat fear? Do you have a suggestion how could I reframe my thinking and my self-image?nThanx my friend, Robertn Hey Bob,Well, you ask the million dollar question; how to defeat fear?

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***QUESTION***

Dave,

Just want to tell you your material is very good and effective. I find that women love a guy that teases them and busts their balls. I find that they like it when a man approaches them and he is completely calm and cool, and even better in control of the situation. Now I admit this, sometimes the way I approach a girl or what I seem to talk about doesn't "hit em" how I wanted it too, like I seem to get boring, pretty damn quikly...and that is when my mind just starts to draw a blank and I dont know..it sucks. But sometimes I say the right things and I just know this for a fact becuz the girl will either have a smile on her face or I'll see her licking her lips...and from what u said in the DYD book thats a good thing...For example: today I was sitting at a round table with just me and a girl,we were facing each other, and I'd say she was about an 8. She dresses real pretty and I said something like "Do you dress nice everyday...Or are you just trying to impress me?" She smiled and licked her lips so I knew that I was right on track...but then I drew a blank...I didnt kno how to continue that convo. What are some normal topics to bring up in a conversation with a girl? What are some interesting ones that they just seem to be very into? What else would help me to keep the convo going and so I don't draw a blank and feel like a dork? I appreciate all the help your book has done, reading about confidence and all that did help..and now I would just like to touch up and become more than just an amatuer. You do not have to post this on the newsletter but hope to hear from you soon.

Later,

D from CT


» MY COMMENTS:

This is a great question.

One of the most important things you can do is MENTALLY PREPARE for these kinds of situations.

Now, I don't want to sound like a weird motivational self- help guy, but mental preparation WORKS.

Take some time when you're alone, close your eyes, and actually plan out how you'd like interactions with women to go. If you've never done this before, you'll learn A LOT from it.

You'll think of things that you never would have imagined when you're taking things step by step in your mind.

One of the OTHER best things you can do is GET A JOURNAL so you can keep notes to yourself.

Try this:

Sit down and write out 20 great things you could have said in that situation, then go through and mentally imagine saying each one five times.

Another important thing to do is ALWAYS KNOW HOW TO GET HER INFORMATION AND WALK AWAY.

If you really sense that the conversation is about to end, you need to know how to ask for her email/number and go.

You can do this at any stage in the conversation, as soon as you'd like.

Here are a few good topics to try when talking to women:

1. Why women are crazy, and men are perfect.

2. That she should stop thinking of you only as a sex object.

3. What she needs to change to have a chance with you.

Of course, you need to be able to present these topics in a COCKY & FUNNY way so she LAUGHS while you're talking about them...

But you'll find that topics like these can create some good fun with women.